The gift of giving...

Lovebugs!!

I HAD to come at you with this one. It is big, HUGE, monumental. How good are you at ACCEPTING gifts?

I LOVE Christmas, birthdays, Easter, Independence, Crop Over, why don't we give gifts at Crop Over? Such fun :) You get me right? I love to give a gift. But I am not that great at receiving. Now a wise old owl once told me that, you should be just as comfortable receiving as giving, because there is a GREAT deal more humility involved in accepting something from someone. You may be unaware of their circumstance, financially or mentally, and whatever they give you whether they can afford it or not is a sacrifice and it takes a measure of generosity and love.

So, Andy and I have received offers from various family and extended family members to assist us with our Wedding,. A few of them in particular keep mentioning the 'harsh economic times' and their willingness to help us with paying for our home and the wedding itself. Cue the pride. Which as we ALL know goes before a fall. And we both find falling quite embarassing, soooooooooooooooo.

Anderson Bowen and Heidi Aboab, don't do receiving very well. It is not that we are arrogant, or puffed up ( although I lean to the arrogance every once in a while, I'm a work in progress). It is that we generally like to work for what we want or need, always have, and we are so used to being independent and taking care of ourselves, that accepting help from anyone but each other or our immediate families (mostly parents) is a foreign concept. And sometimes a little difficult, since we know we have to work for what we want.

We HATE using people. Have zero tolerance for begging, and we try very hard to stay within our means. Our sensitivity towards the subject is so great, that during our frequent car chats, we express how uncomfortable we are when friends pay for dinner, offer to bring things to a lime, family gives us cash or want to give us a thank you gift for something we have done.

BUT, weddings tend to make you a bit humble. At SOME point, you realise that you CANNOT do it all on your own. That people are just as excited for you as you were for them at this point in their lives. That your family and friends are ACUTELY aware that at times because you are sacrificing for your big day that you simply CANNOT out the money for a fun night out, movie, food. Because at $$$ a plate + drinks + VAT, you need to cut back somewhere.

Anderson and I declared our hand early. We are paying for our wedding and honeymoon ourselves, but we know that our friends and families will want to give us gifts. And we graciously and humbly accept. It is about give and take. If you know us, you know we are generous and at times OVERLY generous. Giving of our time, advice, money, in kind. God has blessed and favoured us by meeting all of our needs. We are secure knowing that He has already provided. And part of that means understanding when he has sent one of his angels to bless us, just like we blessed others.

I hope you understand what I mean. Of COURSE we want wedding gifts, that adds to the excitement and fun of the wedding experience, but we also want our family and friends to know that we are SO SO SO SO grateful. That you do not HAVE to do it, but we are APPRECIATIVE and thankful for everything that you do for us now, on wedding day and beyond.
We love you!

We are grateful!!

xoxo,
Anderson & Heidi.